Pawn King Death March

by Zak M.

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Cassette available from ZAP CASSETTES -


released October 31, 2014

Zak - vocals & Teenie Genie



all rights reserved


Zak M. St Louis, Missouri


9/24 - at Chill Dawg Cove w/ DJ Floodgate, Frank Hurricane, Liz Durette, Kevin Harris

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Track Name: Because of YOU
Think back on when we were so hell-bent and youthful -
no, not yet dignified or noble.
We were red in the face, like Scott Hooper.
We would cat-call and ogle.
We were snug in drunk stupor.
Now we only close our eyes when we yodel.

I don't think that it will rain,
don't feel it in my bone.
But you saw it on your phone.

Do you know I'm insane?
Don't roll away the stone.
You're yawning when you moan.

The air is gray.
I'm so lazy.
Eye-roll and groan.
What can I say?
You know the rest.

I'm stuck this way.
I'm complacent.
I'm on my own,
on holiday -
so decadent.
Track Name: Cruisin
Who can I smile at? Who will I pick?
Gonna give me what I want.
I want it now. I need a fix.
You just might be the one!
It's gonna take. You're gonna melt.
Don't front.

Gave it a name - the name didn't stick.
Gave it a number - the number was one.
As ever, a sucker - easily tricked.
Captive and hooked on whatever you sell.

Shaky on my bended knees. You had an elegant gait.
Was this your lucky night - a kneeling drunkard's plea?
I bet you could not wait to buckle up your seat belt and ride.
You're gonna ride. You're gonna rock.
You're gonna shake.
Track Name: Blood and Guts
You always said I should stick to my gut,
but what about you? were a stick in the mud,
better watch what you stick or you're stuck.

You always said I should play it by ear
but all I could hear was the wet on your breath.
You were not cleft in two, you were freed.
You said we weren't more than the sum of your parts.

Do you like what you see when you look in the mirror?
Track Name: Lay So Low
Renegade, run with the sharps.

Cover the piles of wood with a tarp.
Weigh down the tarp on the wood with a stone.
Weigh down the tarp with a stone from the yard.
I love you more than words can measure.

It must be winter, it's already dark.
No wonder I shiver without you to hold.
My neck feels stiff when I sleep with a pillow.
My heart feels broken when I sleep alone.

I saw your breath and it looked like a whisper.
You said you were hurried, you said on the phone.
My breath smells like the trash in my car.
You heart is as black as the mud in the river.

You won't need that look where you're going.
Walk through your life like a coat from the cold.
Your manner is slipping, your cover is blown.
Suck in the fumes from the fire.

The smoke rises up to the stars.
We can't see stars in the sky.
This isn't quite like you pictured.
It doesn't live up to what you were told.

You like to act like you're hard.
But you're putty, you're softer than gold.
You secretly weep like a willow -
Paper-thin skin and brittle bird bones.

Each moment we share is a treasure.
If we nurture this love, it will grow.
Or just pick at the scab till it scars?
You think it is a thing that is withered.

We shoulda known, shoulda known from the start.
All of our keepsakes are starting to mold.
Outside it looks like it's starting to snow.
But we're dry and dusty, right here by the fire.

When I'm running late, I cut through the park.
Wherever I'm going, I'm running on time.
I know I'll quit when I'm ready.
I'll give you a call when I'm on my way home.

Don't make amends to them I wrong.
I know I'll never.
Crawl on my palms like a lizard
When I am feeling low.

Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
You're holed up with your curtains drawn.
Why are you always so tired?
Do you really think I am jealous?
Track Name: yr own bad self !!!
is it "put this behind us" or "put us beyond this" or we hit a snag or a slump?
oh really now - how am I doing in honest? well, you drag me down in the dumps...

you tilt my wound till it stings like betrayal. I am always all-ears to yr giggle and snicker.
yr not playing for keeps, yr playing it safe. so wring yrself out - don't just sit there and shiver.

and when the feeling hits sometimes, you get so sad you just melt.
but you don't have the time for this - yr too busy loving yr own bad self.

is it hurting yr tummy? turning you nauseous? would it fill up a bag? did it come out in clumps?
you turn on your word, renege on your promise. no no no no I'm not mad - I just feel like a chump.

and is it victim or villain - the shaming yr craving? just picture you fretting in yr bathrobe and slippers!
I'm sickened and shrinking - the moon when it's waning - and slivered like fingernail clippings.
Track Name: Swim or Rake
Said it was slower than Christmas
Missus missing her mister
Do you mess up your mind when you mix up your mixture?
Nothing so far from the truth
Nothing so far from the truth

Nothing but a nomad
At least do you ramble with gusto?
Do you stare in a pool when you're flexing your muscles?
Do you love to see the towns pass by?
Do you love to see the towns pass by?

And what when there's nothing to cling to?
When you're stricken with chills and you shudder?
When you're stricken with chills and you shudder?
There's nothing to fear for the wino in the gutter
As long as his bottle stays full

But what when you're running on empty?
And you think the grass is greener
And you think the grass is greener
Do you mean what you say when you're blowing off steam?
Nothing so far from the truth
Track Name: Cobwebs
You never leave this neighborhood if you can help it -
you would turn into a pumpkin or melt.
You are your collection - your filthy roomful.
You do clean up nice too, sweep with a push-broom.

Later, at the station, with a leather bag to lean on,
you whine that you are luckless.
When the whiskey gets you heated,
you will brag that you cum buckets.

But lust is just the devil's spittle -
see, he trickles down your chin.

I swore I'd never write another song with the word "whiskey" in it.
You're a lovely scumbag with a shit-eating grin.

Eager to please, like we lonely, hoping.
Swear it's worth it you shit with the bathroom door wide-open.
Stay up watching something on your phone,

I never leave this neighborhood as well.
Done a desperate thing for every notch on my belt.
I'm a piece of garbage - I live a life of filth.
Dusty dog hair tumbleweeds, ancient mouse shit, cobwebs.

All night I spy my target through the glass.
Everyone's a victim, except for me.
Everyone's a victim.
This one likes to milk it.

Who is the you is the trick, I think.
But the you change each time is the thing.

Did you catch me red-handed?
I always lie when I'm caught in a trap and I'm caught.
I only think intrusive thoughts.

I caught a glimpse but I lost it.
Never in the mood - it's always, "I'm exhausted."
O love, I love a love is toxic.
See me sink my fangs in a toxin,
spreading malicious gossip or coughing.
I know you think I'm obnoxious.
Track Name: Guilt Rhythm
She was exceptional - she was an exception to the rule.
I was licking on her pillow, licking up a puddle of her drool.
And she played the holy fool, while I was genuinely stupid.
She was cool - sunglasses cool.

I didn't bag that little culprit. No, I just eyed her cheerful loping.
She was sultry. She was molten.
I was hoping.

Did we twist that guilty rhythm - that "If You're Ready, Then I'm Willing"?
Now she is wilted, so am I just the vulture, picking?
Now the vultures circle and I am hanging at half-mast.
I was never granted mercy. I was only strangled purple.